Evaluate my task 2 please

[chadny013]

Topic : The best way for government to solve problem of traffic congestion in cities to provide free public transport 24 hours a day 7 days a week. What extent do you agree and disagree with this statement?

Traffic congestion is most severe problem around the world. This is very apparent especially in cities. It is agreed that providing free riding facility in public transport significantly decrease the traffic issue. This will be shown by analysing how public transport reduce the number of using private transport and how people encourage to choose public transport rather than using their own car.
Firstly, easy access to public transport can easily reduce private transport in city. For instance, people willingly cut-off using own cars if government provide free 24/7 services around city. This can be clearly shows that, accessible facility of public transports can decrease traffic jam in city. From this it can be conclude that, free transport facility can easily motivate people and that can bring a positive impact towards traffic jam in city.
Secondly, by using public transport people can save petrol and save the maintenance cost of a car. As a result, it is encourage them to save money by using public transport. Take Melbourne for example, in city there is a free tram facility 24/7 that easily help Melbourne city to manage traffic problems and ranked number one living city from last five years. Therefore, it can be easily understand that, a better public transport for public can diminish traffic congestion in city.
After analysing the areas of free public transport facility around city it is clear that a this facility can cater the needs of people and by the mean time can lessen traffic problem. It is expected that, all country will take initiative to reduce traffic congestion by providing free transport facility for its country people.

[chadny013]

Dear ryan can u check my essay please...

[allen_zhang]

Please try to make your topic sentence grammaticly correct.

[chadny013]

Thanks a lot for ur feed back

[andytruong1202]

Topic : The best way for government to solve problem of traffic congestion in cities to provide free public transport 24 hours a day 7 days a week. What extent do you agree and disagree with this statement?

Traffic congestion is the most severe problem in this world. This is very apparent especially in cities. It is agreed that providing free ride in public transport would significantly decrease the traffic issue. This will be shown by analysing how public transport reduces the number of private transport and how people are encouraged to choose public transport rather than using their own cars.

Firstly, free access to public transport can easily reduce private transport in cities. For instance, people are willing to stop using their own cars if the government provides free 24/7 bus services in cities. This clearly shows that, easy access to public transport can decrease traffic jam in cities. From this, it can be concluded that, free transport facility can easily motivate people to use busesand reduce traffic jams in cities.

Secondly, by using public transport, people can save petrol and save the maintenance cost of a car. As a result, it is encourages them to save money by using public transport. Take Melbourne for example, there is a free tram facility operated 24/7 that easily helps Melbourne city to manage traffic problems and has made Melbourne the best city to live in for the last five years. Therefore, it can be easily understood that, a better public transport can lessen traffic congestion in cities.

After the above analysis, it is clear that 24/7 bus services can cater the needs of people and at the same time can solve traffic problems. It is expected that, all countries will take initiatives to reduce traffic congestion by providing free transport services for their people.

Should make clear points in the introduction,

1st: reduce No. of private cars, thus less traffic jams.
2nd: save money

Then, each point should be followed by each paragraph. Don't mix up the ideas. Better to focus on one point in each paragraph. You can provide explanations and examples for each point you make.

[chadny013]

Thanks for correcting me. Can u tell me how much i can get if i write this way.

[andytruong1202]

Thanks for correcting me. Can u tell me how much i can get if i write this way.

5.5 - 6 i guess

[chadny013]

Thanks for ur reply. I badly need to score 7 in writing.. I got 7 each last time except writing( 6). Wht should i do to increase 1 band in writing

[allen_zhang]

Please look at the qestion:
The best way for government to solve problem of traffic congestion in cities to provide free public transport 24 hours a day 7 days a week

After went through your essasy, I didn't see you answer the question any where!

I would write this essay with ideas below:
1. I disagree with this statement.
2. I agree that providing free transportaion could help to slove traffic jam problem becaus people will drive ther private car less. but I don't think it is the best way because there are many other solutions such as taxing cars and charging congestion fee.
3. free tranportation services could lay more financil burden on governmets. so, it is impractical. in addition, price is not the only conern of citizens. when the transportation systems get overcrowed and extremely uncomfortable because it is free of charge, people will get back to their cars. So, the point is to the improve the capacity of transporation systems.

4. more importantly, 7x24 doesn't seems to be a good idea, currently, most cities provide maybe 7x16 or 7x17 public transport services. it is the midnight when there are no transoport services. I don't think providing 7x24 pubulic thansportation service can help any on traffic.


Anyway, I am not saying I will write an essay like above. For a topic like this, I would be confused - what they want us to say! from my point of view. what I wrote above really answers the question!

[chadny013]

Thanks for correcting me.. I was confused as well. First i thought to be disagree then i start with planning the essay but was came up with those point. But i really need to get 7 in writing. How could i improve can u suggest me plzz

[allen_zhang]

I am the same as you!
Need 7 for each and the writing is the weakness.
I am going to take another exam on the 10th of May.
God bless us!

[chadny013]

Ohh god help us all...