Pls grade my Task 2 writing: Overweight
Posted: Sun Oct 18, 2015 2:16 am
I greatly appreciate if you can evaluate my essay. Thank you very much~ 
In some countries, the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?
News about new outbreaks of infectious diseases like ebola and MERS attracks so much attention from the press and people around the world. However, what people often neglect is the statistical fact that these horrifying viruses cause fewer deaths than obesity, especially true for developed nations. Being overweight has become the biggest threat to public health. Therefore, the question of the causes of obesity and the possible solutions to which need to be solved immediately to keep the issue from worsening further.
One of the most obvious and undisputed causes of obesity is people’s unhealthy diet. Given the fact that people these days live an outrageously fast pace lifestyle, people frequently opt for fast food which contains high levels of fat, carbonhydrate, and cholesterol. All of which contribute to the rise in obesity and other cardiovascular problems in people. In addition, modern lifestyle dictates people to work for long hours and have very minimum time, in not none, to work out. This is a common phenomenon in Hong Kong that people devote 60 to 70 hours a week at their workplace. There is no doubt that people do not have time to look after their weight and health issues.
Nonetheless, there are solutions to combact this problem. First, corporations can take on initiatives to educate their employees the importance of healthy diet and to promote a culture of eating nutritious and well-balanced meals. For instance, a lot of companies have begun incorporating “Green Monday Movement” in which the management of a company has vegetarian lunch with employees every Monday. Further, the government should consider promulgating policies to tighten the labour law to restrict the work hours so that employees will have more time to exercise.
To summarise, the roots of obesity problem in people are due to unhealthy diet and lifestyle. Both the business community and the government can help to improve this issue.
(314 words)
In some countries, the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?
News about new outbreaks of infectious diseases like ebola and MERS attracks so much attention from the press and people around the world. However, what people often neglect is the statistical fact that these horrifying viruses cause fewer deaths than obesity, especially true for developed nations. Being overweight has become the biggest threat to public health. Therefore, the question of the causes of obesity and the possible solutions to which need to be solved immediately to keep the issue from worsening further.
One of the most obvious and undisputed causes of obesity is people’s unhealthy diet. Given the fact that people these days live an outrageously fast pace lifestyle, people frequently opt for fast food which contains high levels of fat, carbonhydrate, and cholesterol. All of which contribute to the rise in obesity and other cardiovascular problems in people. In addition, modern lifestyle dictates people to work for long hours and have very minimum time, in not none, to work out. This is a common phenomenon in Hong Kong that people devote 60 to 70 hours a week at their workplace. There is no doubt that people do not have time to look after their weight and health issues.
Nonetheless, there are solutions to combact this problem. First, corporations can take on initiatives to educate their employees the importance of healthy diet and to promote a culture of eating nutritious and well-balanced meals. For instance, a lot of companies have begun incorporating “Green Monday Movement” in which the management of a company has vegetarian lunch with employees every Monday. Further, the government should consider promulgating policies to tighten the labour law to restrict the work hours so that employees will have more time to exercise.
To summarise, the roots of obesity problem in people are due to unhealthy diet and lifestyle. Both the business community and the government can help to improve this issue.
(314 words)
