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Kindly critique and provide a band score

Posted: Sun Jun 28, 2015 3:20 pm
by angela2013
Some people think that managers alone should make decisions in the company, while other think that employees should be involved. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.

In any organisation apt decesion making help the company to achieve set goals. Recently there has been a move from authoritarian style of management to participative management, which envolve employees in decision making. Some argue that this brings with it myriad of benefits, however, others refute it. Both sides of this debate will be analyzed in this essay before a reasoned conclusion is reached.

On the one hand, participative management instills a sense of ownership and responsibility which motivate employee to increase their productivity. For example, in RNHS hospital located in Sydney involved nurses in prepare their duty schedule and invited their suggest to improve it. Eventually the number of absenties and sick leaves reduced by 30%. Thus from this example it is clear that involving employees participation in decision making, setting goals, work schedules and making suggestion inspire them to work harder for the institute. Thus the merits of participative management are clearly seen.
On the other hand, managers are well trained and skilled in decision making. For instance, multi-national companies such as Microsoft, involving every employees in decision making is nearly impossible. In such large organisations managers analyze the problem and develope strategies for employees after weigh pros and cons of any decision. When looking at the discussion in this light, it is clear why large institutions prefer authoritative style of management.
After pondering upon both sides of the argument, it is felt that although inviting employees in decesion making improve their performance, but sometimes its practicle impossible. It is thus hoped that crucial decisions will be made by managers in foreseeable future.

Re: Kindly critique and provide a band score

Posted: Sun Jun 28, 2015 7:29 pm
by avijit_05
Hi,
1.I find this essay very easy to follow and your points were very clear.
2., but sometimes its practicle impossible --- it is "practically" .


Could you pls provide ur feedback on mine.

In today's world majority of the companies face a difficult task, how to to decision making?.
It is felt by many people that management should be responsible for policy making whereas, others
believe employees should also be involved. This essay will analyze both sides of arguments
before reaching to a reasoned conclusion.

Historically, many people support the idea that employees with vast experience and exposure
should govern the companies. ON lot of occasions it is seen that people with suitable experience
is selected for a higher managerial position. For instance, board members of Yahoo company,
appointed Marrisa Myer for the position of CEO to govern it. They did not appoint someone
within Yahoo with to such a critical post. This clearly shows that that experience and
deep knowledge is valued and hence managers are given the responsibility of making decision
for their companies.

On the contrary, some people argue that employees should also be involved in taking decision
and policy making. Generally it is seen observed that employees executes and follows the
directives given to them. However, it is possible that they could bring the new
perspectives and a different approach to business problems. For example , recently in a IT firm
employees came up with an idea of internal knowledge sharing session portal, which was
highly appreciated by management. In fact, if employees are more involved in decision making
process they might have a feeling of accomplishment and would respect the decision which is being
made.

All things considered, it would be beneficial for companies to come up with a process where
both managers and employees can take decision together. This approach shall bring a sense
of accomplishment for employees and benefit of experience of managers can also be taken.

Re: Kindly critique and provide a band score

Posted: Mon Jun 29, 2015 8:16 pm
by tolya_v
Hi avijit_05

Your writing is quite neatly done and easy to follow.

A few pointers
1. "Historically, many people support the idea that employees with vast experience and exposure
should govern the companies."

I'd say "Over the years, many people have believed that only the employees having vast experience and exposure should become head of a company".

What do you mean by 'exposure' btw?