Academic IELTS Writing Task 2

[atiqomi]

Task 2
In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their level of health and fitness are decreasing.
What do you think ate the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them.

Increase of weight is one of the greatest concern people face now a days. These are various causes which can be pointed out that are contributing in the increase of weight.

Technology has brought a dramatic change in the human history. People are gaining the benefit of technology in all fields of life. It is helpful to humans because has decreased the human labor and more would could be done in less time but it has made man to use less physical energy which cause in gaining more weight. People those who are using more technology must try to find ways to do physical work as well.

Dietary has another role to play in the increase of weight. People are eating more fast food that sometimes not very healthy. Most people are going for restaurants and prefer takes away. When people eat outside of their homes they eat more which is causing the misbalance in their habits of eating. It contributes in gaining more weight. It is preferably recommended that people should be very careful when they have their meal out of their homes and try to choose the food that is healthier.

People do less exercise and spend lots of time watching movies and using internet. Declining interest in the outdoor actives has made the people decline in their level of health and fitness. Sports and outdoor activities can help people to remain healthy. It is important that people should be careful in their eating habits and take time to do physical activities in order to remain fit and healthy throughout their life.

[Flick]

Task 2
In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their level of health and fitness are decreasing.
What do you think ate the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them.

Increasing weight is one of the greatest concerns people face nowadays. There are various causes which can be pointed out that are contributing to this trend.

Technology has brought a dramatic change to our daily lives. People are gaining the benefit of technology in all fields of life. It is helpful to humans because human labor requirements have decreased, and more can be done in less time, but this means people are using less physical energy, which is causing weight gain. People those who are using more technology must try to find ways to do physical work as well.

Diet also has a role to play in the increase of weight. People are eating more fast food that is not very healthy. Most people are eating regularly at restaurants or buying takeaway food. When people eat outside of their homes they eat more, which has a negative impact on their health. This contributes to their weight gain. It is recommended that people should be very careful when they have a meal out of their homes and try to choose food that is healthier.

People do less exercise and spend lots of time watching movies and using the Internet. Declining interest in outdoor actives has led to a decline in people's levels of health and fitness. Sports and outdoor activities can help people to remain healthy. It is important that people should be careful in their eating habits and take time to do physical activities in order to remain fit and healthy throughout their life.

[dmngu9]

'greatest concerns people face nowadays' - i think concerns is not a right word, correct word should be 'issue' or 'problems'

'There are various causes which can be pointed out that are contributing to this trend.' - this sentence is not clear and fairly complicated

'Technology has brought a dramatic change to our daily lives' - never use 'our daily lives' in academic writing

'It is helpful to humans' - i think 'helpful for'

'People those who are using more technology must try to find ways to do physical work as well. ' - i think putting a comma in this sentence to make things clearer and easier to read

[atiqomi]

Thanks for the feedback................