I've done an Academic Writing Practice Test and I would really appreciate your correction and opinion to it.
I'd like to score a band 7 or higher. What do you think?
TASK 1 (20 minutes, at least 150 words)
The graphs below (as an attachment) give information about computer ownership as a percentage of the population between 2002 and 2010, and by level of education for the years 2002 and 2010.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
There are two graphs and both are about computer ownership between the year 2002 and 2010. The fist graph is about computer ownership in general, whereby the numbers of computer owners rise steadily from about 55% to 75% over the eight years. I think a big reason for this incline is the evolution and increase of social networks and electronics such as computers. Computers have also become owner-friendlier, which leads to more people and also older people using computers.
In the second graph we look at the numbers of computer owners by education level in the years 2002 and 2010. the higher the education level is, the more people have a computer. In the year 20020 the population percentage rises from 15% in the section "no high school diploma" to 75% in the "postgraduate qualification" section. In 2010 the number inclines from about 42% to 90%.
TASK 2 (40 minutes, at least 250 words)
Write about the following topic:
A person's worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned
values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important.
To hat extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
I agree with the fact that the social reputation and material possessions are becoming more important over the years. For example at school it is all about who is wearing the coolest shoes, the newest brands and who has the most friends. The media such as American High School films gave us the ideal of well off, well dressed girls and sporty, popular boys. Indeed, it is mostly the younger generation that judges people according to their social status and material possessions. Whenever I meet someone from the older generation such as my grand-mother they don't care about my new Nike shoes or how many friends I have. For my grand-mother it is just important that I'm nice to her and everyone else and that she can trust me.
Even though, a long time ago the people all over the world were divided into multiple classes. At the top there were the priests and monchs, whereby the slaves and pagans were at the very bottom of the class-pyramid. The priests and kings were the rich people, they ruled and had everyone under their control. the middle standard had everything they needed and the bottom class had to beg for food.
Happily, a long time passed since these days and a lot changed over the years. The slavery-business has been forbidden in most countries over the world and kings and priests don't have much power anymore.
Still, I reckon that personal characteristics such as kindness and trust should be worth more than their wealthiness and social reputation. honour is often valued in religious contexts but we should respect and appreciate the people more.
Thank you
