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Writing about 150 words about your dream or ambition.

Posted: Fri Jul 25, 2014 4:40 am
by namkeotn
Everybody always has their own dream which is an incentive for them to work hard and to achieve success in life. I also have a big ambition that i can get a full scholarship to go abroad.
This dream of mine appeared on my mind when i was a child. I think that that studying abroad helps me widen knowledge more than studying in Vietnam. Developed countries have better education than developing countries and my parents also believe this, so they like me go abroad to study because they think that i can get a higher and more valuable certificate. Furthermore, i also want to change the familiar learning environment and make friends with everyone around the world. The most import problem is scholarship help me not to worry about the cost of living, so i will learn in the most effective way. I like going to visit some wonderful places and know more about cultures of many countries in which i stay. I know that to achieve this dream i will have to try my best because this ambition is not easy.
I hope that i can soon achieve this dream in the future. This ambition followed me from my childhood therefore i won't never give it up.
=> I hope everyone comment about this writing for me.

Re: Writing about 150 words about your dream or ambition.

Posted: Fri Jul 25, 2014 12:23 pm
by devaraj
I think that that studying abroad helps me widen knowledge more than studying in Vietnam.

I think that studying abroad helps me widen knowledge more than studying in Vietnam. --> this sentence is not appropriate rewrite needed
I think that my dream of studying abroad helps me to gain more knowledge than studying in Vietnam.



Developed countries have better education than developing countries and my parents also believe this, so they like me go abroad to study because they think that i can get a higher and more valuable certificate.

Developed countries have better education than developing countries and my parents also believe in this, so they like me to go abroad and study because they think that i can get a valuable education.


The most import problem is scholarship help me not to worry about the cost of living, so i will learn in the most effective way. --> it look like a negative sentence but what you are trying to tell is positive that you have scholarship. I think i am not able to understand this sentence because you are telling that cost of living is nothing but living cost in abroad not cost of education so clear in your ideas it look like confusion in your conveying ideas. the reader will think differently. take care about the spelling mistake "import".


The most important problem is cost of education but scholarship help me to pursue my education in abroad, so i will learn in the most effective way.


Overall good attempt. Still need improvement. All the best!.

Re: Writing about 150 words about your dream or ambition.

Posted: Sat Aug 02, 2014 6:10 pm
by saqibali
I supposed, its an older post.
Do you still need to correct this essay?