ESSAY CHECK

[esmersev]

In Britain, when someone gets old they often go to live in a home with
other old people where there are nurses to look after them. Sometimes
the government has to pay for this care.

Who do you think should pay for this care, the government or the family?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from
your own knowledge or experience.

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WHY FAMILIES SHOULD NOT PAY OLD MEMBERS NURSING FEES?

Old people need serious help in their daily life since the dawn of time. This can be seen that there are social organizations which are beneficial for people who are in the last quarter of the life. It is agreed that government should spend money for old people's care which is for nursing.This will be shown by analyzing the existence of government and cheaper nursing.


First of all, government exists for its people who spend their lives for their country. For example, my grandfather worked as a soldier for thirty years to defend his country from enemies. This example clearly shows that without people, government is worthless. This is one of two important reasons why I believe that old people's nursing care should be taken care by the government.

In addition to this, the nursing care can be cheaper if it is taken care by the government. For instance, official hospital nursing fees are cheaper than private ones. When looking at this example, there is no doubt that the cost of the nursing care will be less. It is obvious from this that family should not pay for the nursing care.


After analyzing the areas of existence of government and cheaper nursing, people should not worry for nursing care fees. Thus, it is clear why the idea of taking care of old people's nursing costs can not be supported. It is expected that the money taken by nurses should be provided by government sources.

[candy07]

Hi
your essay needs improvement in many areas

If you want to use memorized phrases in you writing please use them wisely .

Old people need serious help in their daily life since the dawn of time.

This will be shown by analyzing the existence of government and cheaper nursing.

The existence of government does not make it clear what do want to say

[Cara]

Your essay looks like a fuzzy combination of memorised phrases.
And, your topic sentences and examples don't logically relate to each other.