When a country develops its technology, the traditional skills and ways of life die out.
It is pointless to try and keep them alive.To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
In recent times, Science has greatly changed the traditional skills and lifestyle of the people. It is evident in the
transformation from atom to atom bomb, wheelcart to modern cars, and camels to aeroplanes that technology has played a major
role in reshaping the human life. While technology has created faster ways of travelling it also has reshapened the modern
warfare.
In old days, as people used to travel by camels or by wheel carts so it would took more time to travel. For instance, with the invention of motor cars and aeroplanes, travelling time has become much shorter. In addition to this, it has also eliminated all the hardships of those times when travelling was considered as a very labourous job. Thus It could be argued that modern technology has helped in getting faster means of travel.
Secondly, modern technology created the modern warfare that is quite distinguishable from the traditional ways of fighting. Gone are the days when wars were fought with swords and lances. For example, when US army bombarded Heroshima with a nuclear bomb it caused a complete disaster of the land and also resulted in the killings of more than a million people. Thus it could be deducted that the warfare has largely changed with the invention of modern technology.
In conclusion, It could be argued that technology can be used for peaceful purposes in development of human society or could be used in a bad way altogether. It is up to us how we perceive it and use it in our daily day to day life.
how technology affect ways of life
Re: how technology affect ways of life
When a country develops its technology, the traditional skills and ways of life die out.
It is pointless to try and keep them alive.To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
In recent times, S science has greatly changed the traditional skills and lifestyle of the people. It is evident in the
transformation from atom to atom bomb, wheelcart to modern cars, and camels to aeroplanes that technology has played a major
role in reshaping the ( do not need definite article here) human life. While technology has created faster ways of travelling it also has reshapened the (do not need definite article here) modern
warfare.
In the old days, as people used to travel by camels or by wheel carts so it would took take more time to travel. For instance, with the invention of motor cars and aeroplanes, travelling time has become much shorter. In addition to this, it has also eliminated all the hardships of those times when travelling was considered as a (Do not need 'a' here.) very labourous (Do you mean labourious?) job. Thus, (need a comma after sequence words like 'thus') It could be argued that modern technology has helped in getting faster means of travel.
Secondly, modern technology created the modern warfare that is quite distinguishable from the traditional ways of fighting. Gone are the days when wars were fought with swords and lances. For example, when US army bombarded Heroshima (Hiroshima) with a nuclear bomb it caused a complete disaster of the land and also resulted in the killings of more than a million people. Thus, it could be deducted (deduced) that the warfare has largely changed with the invention of modern technology.
In conclusion, It could be argued that technology can be used for peaceful purposes (Did you talk about peace in this essay? I do not think you did.) in development of human society or could be used in a bad way altogether. It is up to us how we perceive it and use it in our daily day to day life.
Ahmad, Your English is actually not so bad. Sadly, the prompt is not answered here. You did not talk about whether you agree or disagree that "traditional skills" die out and that it is "pointless to keep them alive."
If this essay were graded today, it would likely earn:
Task Response: 1
Coherence and Cohesion: 6
Lexical Response: 6
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 5
Be sure to answer the prompt and try to use a mix of simple and complex sentences to increase your score.
It is pointless to try and keep them alive.To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
In recent times, S science has greatly changed the traditional skills and lifestyle of the people. It is evident in the
transformation from atom to atom bomb, wheelcart to modern cars, and camels to aeroplanes that technology has played a major
role in reshaping the ( do not need definite article here) human life. While technology has created faster ways of travelling it also has reshapened the (do not need definite article here) modern
warfare.
In the old days, as people used to travel by camels or by wheel carts so it would took take more time to travel. For instance, with the invention of motor cars and aeroplanes, travelling time has become much shorter. In addition to this, it has also eliminated all the hardships of those times when travelling was considered as a (Do not need 'a' here.) very labourous (Do you mean labourious?) job. Thus, (need a comma after sequence words like 'thus') It could be argued that modern technology has helped in getting faster means of travel.
Secondly, modern technology created the modern warfare that is quite distinguishable from the traditional ways of fighting. Gone are the days when wars were fought with swords and lances. For example, when US army bombarded Heroshima (Hiroshima) with a nuclear bomb it caused a complete disaster of the land and also resulted in the killings of more than a million people. Thus, it could be deducted (deduced) that the warfare has largely changed with the invention of modern technology.
In conclusion, It could be argued that technology can be used for peaceful purposes (Did you talk about peace in this essay? I do not think you did.) in development of human society or could be used in a bad way altogether. It is up to us how we perceive it and use it in our daily day to day life.
Ahmad, Your English is actually not so bad. Sadly, the prompt is not answered here. You did not talk about whether you agree or disagree that "traditional skills" die out and that it is "pointless to keep them alive."
If this essay were graded today, it would likely earn:
Task Response: 1
Coherence and Cohesion: 6
Lexical Response: 6
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 5
Be sure to answer the prompt and try to use a mix of simple and complex sentences to increase your score.
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AhmadMukhtiar
- Posts: 32
- Joined: Sat Mar 22, 2014 1:51 am
Re: how technology affect ways of life
Thank you for a good analysis. I have learnt some good things from it.