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Pleas review my writing task 1

Posted: Mon Jul 04, 2016 12:24 pm
by Dzzz
You have recently moved to a different house.

Write a letter to a an English-speaking friend. In your letter

- explain why you have moved
- describe the new house
- invite your friend to come and visit


Dear Martin,

I hope this letter finds you in good health. I’m writing you to inform that I have moved to a new house in the centre of Amsterdam.The are several reasons of why I did move to this house, which I’ll explain further in this letter.

As you already know I graduated the University last year and started to work for an IT company in the city centre. Thus living outside the centre have become a problem to me because I had to spend two hours every day in order to get to work.

I really like this new house, as it’s larger than my old one. It has 3 bedrooms, and 2 bathrooms with large kitchen. The main living room is specious, and has great view of a river. There’s a small backyard with barbecue area. It was renovated last year, so the furniture inside the house is all new and modern.

I’m going to have a party next Saturday, to celebrate relocation, so I'm inviting you to come and visit me at my new house.

Best wishes,
Your friend Walter White

Re: Pleas review my writing task 1

Posted: Tue Jul 05, 2016 4:49 am
by David.IELTS.Examiner
Hello!

Overall, this is a very good letter - well done!

Two suggestions:

1. Develop the point about the party. Who is coming? What time? Where should people park their cars?

2. Watch out for (fairly) basic errors - I graduated FROM university last year, THERE are several reasons WHY I MOVED ...

All the best,
David

Re: Pleas review my writing task 1

Posted: Thu Jul 14, 2016 7:30 pm
by Flick
Dzzz wrote:You have recently moved to a different house.

Write a letter to a an English-speaking friend. In your letter

- explain why you have moved
- describe the new house
- invite your friend to come and visit


Dear Martin,

I hope this letter finds you in good health. I’m writing to inform you that I have moved to a new house in the centre of Amsterdam.The are several reasons why I moved to this house, which I’ll explain further in this letter.

As you already know, I graduated from university last year and started to work for an IT company in the city centre. Thus, living outside the centre has become a problem to me because I had to spend two hours every day in order to get to work.

I really like this new house, as it’s larger than my old one. It has 3 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms with a large kitchen. The main living room is spacious, and has a great view of a river. There’s a small backyard with a barbecue area. It was renovated last year, so the furniture inside the house is all new and modern.

I’m going to have a party next Saturday to celebrate my relocation, so I'm inviting you to come and visit me at my new house.

Best wishes,
Your friend Walter White