Please comment on my task 2 essay and give me feedback

[fas_saf28]

Essay Question: Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Response
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In this competitive world, people have become self-oriented and less caring for others. This has caused an important requirement for children to learn good principles right from the beginning. Because of this some believe that children should learn about as how to compete with others. On a different side, others suggest that learning about co-operation is better than competition to become helpful to this society. This essay will outline both these views before arriving to a reasonable conclusion.

Some believe that children should be taught as how to compete with others right from their childhood. Today, due to increasing population, the competition among all grows along-side with it. So to become successful in life, young children are instilled with the technique to compete with their peers. This clearly shows the reason why it is believed that children should be taught about how to compete and achieve success.

On the contrary, others believe that children should learn about co-operation rather than competition. According to the famous wording "United we stand, divide we fall", today, most followed individual like Bill Gates achieved huge success in their career only by working according to team building procedures. This makes it evident that by practicing team work one could become a successful and famous beyond limits.

After seeing both these views, without a shadow of doubt it is agreed that big goals are accomplished only by practicing team effort management rather than learning about the sense of competition alone. It is recommended that young students should focus more in learning about team building, only which majorly helps them turn useful to their surrounding in future.

[saqibali]

If you kindly send me this in word file, I will edit it properly with excellent formatting.I will do this in my earliest free time.

[fas_saf28]

Hi Saqibali

I'm unable to attach the essay in .doc, .txt or .rtf format. Could you please suggest e an alternate option to forward this essay to you?