Please evaluate my task 1 response

[luke Thompson]

The given first graph is indicating that how many specialists were obliged to have a fly with passengers in Australia and four various countries. The second chart illustrates data about the number of of complaints lodged and average kilogram of each person's suitcase.

Overall, as is clearly seen from the graphs that while , the figures for the number of crew and baggage weight in Germany were relatively high, the quantity in New Zealand was lightest one.

More specifically, the largest colleague of crew was related to Germany with 15. Making it less popular Indonesia made up 11 people .However, The airline that required less people was New Zealand with a mere 6.

Concerning the second graph, In comparison, with the amount of baggage weight in Germany ,which had a heaviest 38 kg per capita, the number in New Zealand experienced the smallest figure only 15 kilogram.Moreover Indonesian and Malaysian Airplanes carried out virtually same amounts 32 and 30 respectively. In terms of complaints ,people who flew in German airplanes were the most satisfied from services with only a complaint while this number accounted for 6 In New Zealand.

[David.IELTS.Examiner]

Hello!

I think that you could have organised the report better and compared the data for each item, leaving a comparison across the categories for the summary. For example ...

Introduction
Crew
Complaints
Luggage
Summary

For comparisons, within each item/category and between them, you could use words and phrases like double, twice, half, just over, almost, more, fewer, etc.

There are quite a lot of basic grammatical errors (e.g. is indicating) and vocabulary errors (e.g. fly, colleague).

All the best,
David