Dear friends, please take a look on this essay. What is your opinion? Thank you!

[Ekaterina]

It is virtually impossible these days to access news about the world without being exposed to endless advertising. Because of this, some people think that traditional media sources no longer deliver an honest view of the world but rather one that pleased the companies that advertise them.
To what extend do you agree to this idea?
What are some ways a person can get more trustworthy news?
Provide detailed reasons and examples to support your view.


In today’s modern world, people are under advertising pressure every time they learn latest news or brose on the Internet. This is the reason the relevance of given information and news is under public discussion. It is believed that mass media have started pointing out those companies that paid to be advertised. This essay will provide the opinion to this idea and extra source of valid information will be discussed.

For the start, the number of ad is ever-increasing year by year becoming greatly irritating for people. Like for instance, popular magazines such as Cosmopolitan have more than 40% of cosmetics advertising on its pages. Moreover, the articles they write contain hidden products’ mentioning thus making people think in favour of that goods. This makes people assume that mass media publications deliver their views based on paid advertising contracts. Hence, it is clearly can be seen that traditional informative sources do not provide an honest opinions.

Although, some people still use newspapers, magazines, and TV news to inquire world news, others gravitate to independent media. For example, the majority of countries have TV channel or newspaper which operate out of business pressure. As a result, they provide a clear view of ongoing global processes and news delivering true to people. It is proven that this sources can be used as a base of independent opinions that means an access to valid information.

In conclusion, whether to follow marketing trends and receive paid information or switch our attention to less commercial media is people’s conscious choice. There is no doubt people are motivated by excessive advertising. As soon they realize that they are under mass media control as sooner people gravitate to media with a lack of commercial purpose.

[David.IELTS.Examiner]

Hello!

I like your first main paragraph - and I agree with your general point - but remember that just because a soft advertisement praises a product, it does not automatically mean that the ad is lying.

I also like your second main paragraph, but here you have failed to say how 'independent' media is immune to the effects of advertising and advertisers. Bear in mind that many 'independent' media espouse such wonderful ideas as the world is flat, the British Royal Family are lizards, people have never been into space, etc. Is this - as you say - "valid information"?

The conclusion does not contain your personal opinion. This is required by the question.

Overall, there are some very good parts to this essay, but there are also some weak ones. Grammar is good with regard to accuracy, but limited interms of range. Vocabulary is not used effectively to create a solid argument.

All the best,
David

[Weekend]

Hi sir David,

May i ask if my structure on answering this type of question is correct..?

Thesis: i completely agree that most of the news are to some extent biased with advertising,however,there are other ways to access reliable news information.

B1---discuss about ways mass media are unreliable or biased
B2---discuss other ways to access reliable new info

P.S However i can not think of where to access reliable news info without ads.

[David.IELTS.Examiner]

Hello!

There are several ways of structuring this kind of essay and yours is fine.

David

[Weekend]

Thankyou !(:

[Flick]

It is virtually impossible these days to access news about the world without being exposed to endless advertising. Because of this, some people think that traditional media sources no longer deliver an honest view of the world but rather one that pleased the companies that advertise them.
To what extend do you agree to this idea?
What are some ways a person can get more trustworthy news?
Provide detailed reasons and examples to support your view.


In today’s modern world, people are under advertising pressure every time they look for the latest news or browse on the Internet. This is the reason the relevance of given information and news is under public discussion. It is believed that mass media have started favoring those companies that pay to be advertised. This essay will provide an opinion on this idea and alternative sources of valid information will be discussed.

Firstly, the number of ads is ever-increasing year by year, becoming greatly irritating for people. For instance, popular magazines such as Cosmopolitan have more than 40% of content comprised of cosmetics advertising. Moreover, the articles they write contain hidden product promotion, thus making people unconsciously favor those goods. This makes people assume that mass media publications deliver their views based on paid advertising contracts. Hence, it can clearly be seen that traditional informative sources do not provide honest opinions.

Although some people still use newspapers, magazines, and TV news to learn about world news, others gravitate to independent media. For example, the majority of countries have a TV channel or newspaper which operates outside of business pressure. As a result, they provide a clear view of ongoing global processes and news, delivering truth to people. It is proven that these sources can be used as a basis for independent opinions and access to valid information.

In conclusion, whether to follow marketing trends and receive paid information or switch our attention to less commercial media is people’s conscious choice. There is no doubt people are motivated by excessive advertising. As soon as they realize that they are under mass media control, people tend to gravitate to media with a lack of commercial purpose.