Increasing sporting facilities

[Prefer Ndabambi]

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sport facilities. Others however say that this would have little effect on public health and other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.


A certain percentage of the population believe that having more sporting facilities will enhance the well being of the general population. On the other hand, others suggest that sporting facilities should be fortified with other measures to have a remarkable effect on public health. These points of views will be discussed below.

Increasing sport facilities may enhance well being of the public since a variety of activities will be available to the people. The public can partake in these activities hence improve their health. For instance if there are many gym facilities in the neighbourhood, people can partake in the gym activities hence improve their health.

On the other hand, others suggest that having more sporting facilities will not soley better the well being of the population but other measures should be encompassed to achieve this goal. The media can play a role in imparting knowledge on healthy eating habits.Television programmes on preparing healthy diet can be added especially during the evening time since most people will be watching television. Adverts on benefits of healthy eating can also be used. This measure coupled with increasing sporting facilities may lead to an improvement in the general well being of the public.

After analysis of the above mentioned points, I think that other measures should be coupled with having more sporting facilities so as to better the well being of the public.

[David.IELTS.Examiner]

Hello!

The first main paragraph is undeveloped. (It's the same length as the introduction!) You use 'can' and 'may' - there's a GREAT opportunity there!

Second main paragraph, first sentence - why?

Overall, the points are unclear and undeveloped.

All the best,
David

[Flick]

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sport facilities. Others however say that this would have little effect on public health and other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.


A certain percentage of the population believes that having more sporting facilities will enhance the well-being of the general population. On the other hand, others suggest that sporting facilities should be fortified with other measures to have a positive effect on public health. These points of views will be discussed below.

Increasing the number of sport facilities may enhance the well-being of the public since a variety of activities will be available to everyone. The public can partake in these activities, hence improve their health. For instance, if there are many gym facilities in the neighbourhood, people can participate in gym activities in order to improve their health.

On the other hand, others suggest that having more sporting facilities will not better the well-being of the population and that other measures should be considered to achieve this goal. The media can play a role in imparting knowledge on healthy eating habits.Television programmes on preparing healthy food can be added, especially during the evening time since most people will be watching television then. Adverts on the benefits of healthy eating can also be used. This measure, coupled with increasing sporting facilities, may lead to an improvement in the general well-being of the public.

After analysing the above mentioned points, I think that other measures should be coupled with having more sporting facilities so as to better the well-being of the public.