PLEASE KINDLY ASSESS MY WRITING TASK 2 - RELOCATE TO SUBURBAN AREAS

[hollanda]

Accommodation and transport problems are increasing in many large cities. Businesses are encouraged to move to rural areas. Do advantages outweigh disadvantages?

People hold different views about whether factories and manufacturing companies should be motivated to relocate to countryside in order to mitigate the problems of accommodation and transportation in big cities. While this initiative in deed offers a number of benefits, I would argue that these benefits are outweighed by the drawbacks.

On the one hand, there are several persuasive reasons for businesses to move to rural areas. Firstly, it is undoubtedly true that there is more available land in rural than in urban areas. Therefore, if a new factory is erected in rural area, the level of costs for building will be reduced. This definitely benefits the factory as they can spend more capital in other fields in order to generate revenue. The second benefit is the increase in job opportunities for local residents. As many local people are employed, there will be fewer people move to cities for the hope of seeking for jobs. As a result, excess demand for accommodation and transport in cities can be solved ultimately.

Nevertheless, I am convinced that this trend can bring about more disadvantages then advantages. Infrastructure and roads in countryside are indisputable less developed than in central cities. This is likely to decelerate the development of business and increase a range of additional costs such as delivery costs. Furthermore, some typical businesses such as marketing and advertising are commonly seen to need a competitive environment to develop. If these businesses operated in rural areas, they might find it hard to attract potential partners and customers.

In conclusion, although relocating businesses to rural areas can be advantageous to some extent, it seems to me that these potential advantages are less significant than the possible disadvantages.

[David.IELTS.Examiner]

Hello!

The first paragraph is good, but the second makes assumptions that are unexplained. For example, the 'competitive environment' might be the internet. If companies from different countries can compete, I don't see why those from rural areas cannot. Besides, those areas wouldn't be rural once they had become towns and cities.

All the best,
David