Please assess my writing topic and give me probable IELTS grade

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zein.ahmed24
Posts: 8
Joined: Thu Dec 17, 2015 9:56 am

Please assess my writing topic and give me probable IELTS grade

Post by zein.ahmed24 »

You eat at your college cafeteria every lunchtime. However, you think it needs some improvements.

Write a letter to the college magazine. In you letter

explain what you like about the cafeteria
say what is wrong with it
suggest how it could be improved


Dear Team

First of all i would like to thank you very much for your efforts and usual innovation techniques to improve the overall satisfactory level of the clients.

The staff is really helpul, very friendly and trying to have fun with the clients which is creating warm atmosphere in the Cafeteria and encouraging students to meet up there between their lecture times taking lunch and spending nice time.

Also i would like to express my great satisfaction towards the new menu improvement especially coffee & desserts.

However i would like to grab your attention towards the miss organization of the Cashier if you are going to order something take away , there is only one queue and sometimes if i want a snack or some coffee i take alot of time until you take my order due the long queue.


I suggest that you can increase the number of cashiers to 2 or 3 , this will shorten the queues as you are the only cafeteria in the college and number of students is large so i think taking actions towards this negative point is really important

Thank you !

Best RsgArds


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David.IELTS.Examiner
IELTS Examiner
IELTS Examiner
Posts: 1371
Joined: Tue May 05, 2015 4:34 am

Re: Please assess my writing topic and give me probable IELTS grade

Post by David.IELTS.Examiner »

Hello!
Usual innovation techniques?!
Change 'spending' to 'having'
Satisfaction WITH, not towards
... and it takes a lot of time until my order is taken ...
... I think that taking action on this point is really important
Overall, a good letter. Just be a little careful with phrasing and grammar.
All the best,
David
zein.ahmed24
Posts: 8
Joined: Thu Dec 17, 2015 9:56 am

Re: Please assess my writing topic and give me probable IELTS grade

Post by zein.ahmed24 »

Thank you David, what is my writing band approximately ?


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