Task 1 Line chart, share and need comments

Post your Task 1 or 2 response and/or read the responses of other students and provide feedback.
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scottweiguo
Posts: 3
Joined: Sat Nov 14, 2015 9:54 am

Task 1 Line chart, share and need comments

Post by scottweiguo »

QQ图片20151127000634.jpg
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The line chart provides information about the trend of domestic access to four modern technological devices: CD player, mobile phone, internet and home computer in the United Kingdom over seven years from 1996 to 2003.

In general, the four devices saw a upward trend of familes access in the UK over the seven years. Among them, there was a dramatical growth in the propotion of the access to mobile phone and internet, both enjoying a more than trippled increase, from 18% to 70% for mobile phone and 10% to 45% for internet.

By contrast, the growth of the percentage of CD player and home computer access was relatively slow. The proportion of CD player access climbed gradually, from 60% in 1996/97 to 82% in 2002/03. Similarily, home computer had seen a rise of 30% by the year ended in 2003. However, CD player had remained the highest percentage of domestic access among the four devices through out the seven year period.

Noticeably, modern technology had a growing access and use by families in the UK within the given period of time.

Word count:177
David.IELTS.Examiner
IELTS Examiner
IELTS Examiner
Posts: 1371
Joined: Tue May 05, 2015 4:34 am

Re: Task 1 Line chart, share and need comments

Post by David.IELTS.Examiner »

Hi Scott!
Very good. You have covered all the main points and noted the main trends. Overall, good vocab and grammar too.
1. dramatic, not dramatical
2. more than tripled, not more than trippled increase
All the best,
David
scottweiguo
Posts: 3
Joined: Sat Nov 14, 2015 9:54 am

Re: Task 1 Line chart, share and need comments

Post by scottweiguo »

David.IELTS.Examiner wrote:Hi Scott!
Very good. You have covered all the main points and noted the main trends. Overall, good vocab and grammar too.
1. dramatic, not dramatical
2. more than tripled, not more than trippled increase
All the best,
David
Thank you very much for your help David. But just regarding with the second correction, so does that mean I can not use trippled to modify " increase" as a noun word? I could recall things I probably like " there was a doubled increase in........ or a trippled increase.... ".
n0m4n
Posts: 17
Joined: Tue Aug 25, 2015 3:16 pm

Re: Task 1 Line chart, share and need comments

Post by n0m4n »

Overall good vocabulary and writing style!

The line chart provides information about the trend of domestic access to four modern technological devices: CD player, mobile phone, internet and home computer in the United Kingdom over seven years from 1996 to 2003.

In general, the four devices technologies saw a an upward trend of familes families access in the UK over the seven years. Among them, there was a dramatical dramatic growth in the proportion of the access to mobile phone and internet, both enjoying a more than trippled three-times increase, from 18% to 70% for mobile phone and 10% to 45% for internet.

By contrast, the growth of the percentage of CD player and home computer access was relatively slow. The proportion of CD player access climbed gradually, from 60% in 1996/97 to 82% in 2002/03. Similarily, home computer had seen a rise of 30% by the year ended in 2003. However, CD player had remained the highest percentage of domestic access among the four devices throughout the seven year seven-year period.

Noticeably, modern technology had a growing access and use by families in the UK within the given period of time.
scottweiguo
Posts: 3
Joined: Sat Nov 14, 2015 9:54 am

Re: Task 1 Line chart, share and need comments

Post by scottweiguo »

n0m4n wrote:Overall good vocabulary and writing style!

The line chart provides information about the trend of domestic access to four modern technological devices: CD player, mobile phone, internet and home computer in the United Kingdom over seven years from 1996 to 2003.

In general, the four devices technologies saw a an upward trend of familes families access in the UK over the seven years. Among them, there was a dramatical dramatic growth in the proportion of the access to mobile phone and internet, both enjoying a more than trippled three-times increase, from 18% to 70% for mobile phone and 10% to 45% for internet.

By contrast, the growth of the percentage of CD player and home computer access was relatively slow. The proportion of CD player access climbed gradually, from 60% in 1996/97 to 82% in 2002/03. Similarily, home computer had seen a rise of 30% by the year ended in 2003. However, CD player had remained the highest percentage of domestic access among the four devices throughout the seven year seven-year period.

Noticeably, modern technology had a growing access and use by families in the UK within the given period of time.
Thank you very much for your help!
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