TASK 2 Comment for grammar, sentence structure and fluency

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umairomee
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Joined: Wed Nov 05, 2014 1:31 pm

TASK 2 Comment for grammar, sentence structure and fluency

Post by umairomee »

Nowadays, people usually search for those jobs which pay them a handsome amount of remuneration at the end of month. Very few people look into the added benefits, beside salary, in a job. It is argued that people should not consider the salary as the only deciding factor when selecting a job. This will be analyzed based on two factors, one is that people should consider career growth and second is people should consider impact of a job on society.
Career growth is an important factor when one is choosing a job. For example, if one chooses to do a job in Microsoft, a fortune 500 company, instead of a small company even for a lower pay, he or she is better off. Therefore, one is more beneficial in the long term if one keeps in view the aspect of career growth. Thus, it is clear from the above example that one should not choose the job based only on the salary.
Positive impact of a job on society is extremely important. Take for an instance Abdul Sattar Edhi, a famous social worker, has a profound positive impact on the lives of millions of people. Therefore one must consider, when choosing a job, what impact he or she will have on the society. Hence, after analyzing it is clear that one should not choose a job solely on the basis of monthly income.
To sum up, factors like future career growth as well as impact of job on a society are more important than salary. It is believed that one should not choose salary as the only feature of a job when selecting a job. It is recommended that there should be some sort of awareness programs which gives information about choosing a career path.
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Flick
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Re: TASK 2 Comment for grammar, sentence structure and fluen

Post by Flick »

umairomee wrote:Nowadays, people usually search for those jobs which pay them a handsome amount of remuneration at the end of the month. Very few people look into the added benefits, beside salary, in a job. It is argued that people should not consider salary as the only deciding factor when selecting a job. This will be analyzed based on two factors, one is that people should consider career growth and the second is people should consider the impact of a job on society.

Career growth is an important factor when one is choosing a job. For example, if one chooses to work at Microsoft, a fortune 500 company, instead of a small company even for a lower pay, he or she is better off.(<--Can you explain why?) Therefore, it is more beneficial in the long term if one keeps in view the aspect of career growth. Thus, it is clear from the above example that one should not choose a job based only on the salary.

A job having a positive impact on society is extremely important. Take, for instance, Abdul Sattar Edhi, a famous social worker, who has had a profoundly positive impact on the lives of millions of people.(<--Can you explain this positive impact with an example or more details?) Therefore one must consider, when choosing a job, what impact he or she will have on society. Hence, after analyzing these points, it is clear that one should not choose a job solely on the basis of monthly income.

To sum up, factors like future career growth as well as impact of a job on society are more important than salary. It is believed that one should not choose salary as the only feature of a job when selecting an appropriate position. It is recommended that there should be some sort of awareness program which provides information about choosing a career path.
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